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3 Ways To Solve Confidence Issues
Do you have a goal you’d like to hit but you just don’t have confidence that you can accomplish it?
Does this lack of confidence paralyze you into inactivity, or cause what I like to call chronic hesitation (a.k.a procrastination)?
If you’re in that situation now or have been anytime in the past, you can breathe a sigh of relief. You aren’t strange, in fact; if you’ve never found yourself in that situation, I think you’re strange. 🙂
Everybody faces confidence issues from time to time. I’m sure you can easily recall one of those times and remember how active your mind was as it flitted through all the little details and no matter how quickly you picked it up, you still felt as though you were stumbling through as you struggled to master whatever it was you were looking to do.
Many people are so terrified of the perceived pain of insecurity that they allow themselves to become completely overwhelmed by the smallest things. It’s as though they are completely incapable of stepping back and looking at everything from a high level so they can see things clearly and develop a plan to navigate through the learning process.
This is especially something that you will experience if you make the bold decision to step out and pursue your passion as a career. The beauty is NOW YOU KNOW WHAT TO EXPECT! You won’t be surprised when you begin to have those insecure feelings. The following are things that you can do to head these feelings off, or at least reduce the time you’ll experience the lack of confidence.
Get Obsessive! The best way to become the great at anything is to gain as much knowledge and proficiency as you possibly can, as quickly as you can. I look at it just like ripping off a band-aid. You can do it slowly, but all you’ll do is cause more pain and for a longer period of time. If you simply rip it off fast … it’ll still hurt but it’ll be over much quicker and it won’t cause you nearly as much pain.
If you’ve got something you want to accomplish, or something you believe you have a budding passion … dive in and GET OBSESSIVE! If you focus consistently and intensely on a topic you love, or on how to accomplish a certain task for an extended period of time, you will find you can accomplish amazing things.
Associate With The Right People. The saying that misery loves company couldn’t be more accurate! One of the worst things you can do is to hang around people who are negative, or aren’t supportive. This isn’t an easy thing to do because sometimes the people that are the worst are those you are closest to.
I know it’s tough but I can guarantee you if you continuously associate with people who are negative or people who are constantly draining your emotional resources, you need to suck it up, and move on. If not, you need to get used to living a life filled with much unhappiness and negativity. You can still love these people, but you cannot subject yourself to that environment for extended periods of time without picking up the same thought process and adopting the same behavior patterns.
The bottom line is if you associate with positive people, they will be supportive of you and will believe in you when you may not even believe in yourself. This will have a direct impact on your confidence level.
Choose Your Words Carefully. Words are extremely powerful whether they are spoken or not. That may sound a bit strange but if you think about it … the way you refer to things in conversations, is the same way you’ll think about things during times of reflection. If you are constantly talking about all the reasons you CAN’T do something, this sentiment will lead to the exact same type of internal dialogue.
It isn’t just saying you CAN’T do something. It’s also saying things like: I’m not very smart, or that you are broke, or that you weren’t very good in school, or you really screwed up once and now you have limited options. These type of thoughts and statements will become self fulfilling prophecies.
If you only do one thing after reading this post, I encourage you to focus on the words you say and the thoughts that occupy your mind over the next couple days. When you catch yourself thinking negative thoughts or making negative, self defeating statements …. STOP and either rephrase it or re-position the way you are thinking about it. If you do this consistently, it will become a habit and you can break the pattern and have a much more enjoyable life.
Nice post Pete….Very refreshing…I have had this view point for years but have fallen victim to this thought pattern as a result of being around negative family members and friends….Good stuff!
However…I am always doing everything I can to stay positive:-)
Intentionally focusing on being positive will definitely help Joe! The more you focus on remaining positive, the more receptive you’ll be and you’ll attract like-minded, positive people. I know from experience. 🙂