Pete Brand
Grand Rapids, MI

I am married to an incredible woman named Amanda and have five amazing children. I would consider myself an entrepreneur and absolutely love the challenge of building businesses. I also love the journey of personal development. I don't believe in drifting through life on auto-pilot. I believe we are presented each day with opportunities to improve and become better. I choose to embrace these opportunities and use the lessons I learn to become a better "me" and continuously strive to embrace each moment!

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8 Reasons Why It’s Difficult To Find Your Passion

By on January 16, 2012

Have you tried every trick in the book to identify your passions, but feel like you’ve made no progress?

Are you beginning to think you’ve totally lost your passion and that’s why you can’t find it?

Answering the question, “What is your passion?” can be just as challenging as answering the question, “What are your hobbies?” when you’re a parent with little children in your house.

My response was always…

“Hobbies? … what hobbies?!?!?!  I am too busy running the kids around and making sure I keep them alive to have hobbies!”

Well, just because there are reasons preventing you from identifying your passion, doesn’t mean you’ve completely lost it.  You can certainly awaken it from it’s state of  “hibernation” if you approach finding it with the right mindset.  Just like any issues we’re experiencing in life though … we first need to admit we have a problem before we can get better.

The following are 8 reasons you may be having a mental block when it comes to identifying your passion.  I believe that if you identify the reasons you’re having a tough time, you can begin to re-position that difficulty in your mind by realizing it is simply an excuse and not some monumental obstacle.

Your insecurities are stronger than your dreams.  All of us deal with insecurities in life and unfortunately too many people allow those insecurities to control their lives instead of taking control and making the decision to move past them.  It’s very difficult, if not impossible, to make strong forward progress if you’re constantly hesitating or second guessing your decisions.

If you’d like to overcome this obstacle, take some time to figure out exactly what your dreams are.  If you’ve allowed life to beat you down to the point where your dreams are too  small, work on getting them bigger and find a big enough reason to get out of your comfort zone and overcome those insecurities.  People who stop dreaming, start dying.  Don’t do that!  🙂

You’re too afraid to brag about your skills.  When you were growing up and excited about a first time accomplishment and excitedly shared it with one of your friends, did your parents say something like … “Honey, people don’t like braggers.” ?

There’s a big difference between bragging and simply being passionate about something you’re skilled at.  If you’re constantly talking about yourself and your accomplishments without adding any value to the person your speaking to … then you’re bragging.  If you are talking about your accomplishments to gain credibility that’s not.

I understand there is a very fine line between both, but that’s where self awareness comes in.  Just be sure the conversation ultimately ends with you delivering value and that the content isn’t solely centered around how great you are, and you’ll be fine. I’m sure your parents would agree.

You don’t believe that YOU MATTER or that you can make a difference. Whether you believe it or not, everyone has the ability to make a difference in the world.  Yes, even you!  Whether it’s as simple as picking a piece of paper off the ground and throwing it in the garbage, or as large as talking with someone who’s horribly depressed and you say something that ultimately prevents them from doing something permanent … you definitely make a difference in this world.  Don’t allow yourself to fall into the trap of thinking otherwise!

You believe it is selfish to be focusing on your own happiness.  There is absolutely no way of maximizing the contribution you can make within your passion area, or your life without spending time focusing on your own happiness.  If you have this thought process just ask yourself the following question:

“If I don’t focus on your own happiness, who will?”  You’re right … NOBODY!  It is impossible to do great things with your life if you aren’t happy.  Unhappiness leads to depression.  Depression leads to paralysis and non-activity.  The most important thing you can do in your life is to make sure you focus on doing whatever it takes to be happy, as long as that doesn’t mean doing it at the expense of somebody else.

Your too busy maintaining your chaotic, unhappy life.  Seriously?!?!  Why the heck would you want to spend your time and energy attempting to maintain something that brings you no joy?  Change isn’t easy for anyone, but it’s something that is necessary if you ever want to improve your situation in life.  Don’t be too busy being miserable to have any time left to become happy.

You think it’s wrong to do what you love. Many people fall into this trap because they’ve bought into the “back to the grindstone” mentality.  Work has traditionally been associated with pain. Society constantly reinforces this message in movies and everywhere else we look.  You don’t have to buy into that BS!

Perhaps you’ve heard the famous saying “If you do what you love, you’ll never have to work a day in your life.”  Well, it’s true.  Quit buying into the garbage that society has been cramming down your throat, and find your passion so you can begin to associate work with happiness.  I promise you’ll love it!

You’re afraid because the last time you pursued your passion, you failed.  This reason should get you excited since every successful person in history failed many times before they finally emerged victorious!  It’s impossible to improve without identifying things that don’t work along the way.  The next time you fail, instead of getting down, get excited that you’re one step closer to succeeding!

You’re afraid if you identify your passion that you’ll actually have to do something.  If this is the reason you’re using to not identify your passion I’m not sure there’s anything I can say that’ll motivate you.  The beauty is when you finally do find your passion you won’t have to worry about finding the motivation to “do something.”  When you TRULY find your passion, the energy and motivation will be in abundance.

I hope this post has allowed you to see how ridiculous it is to allow these things to prevent you from finding your passion.  I’m hoping that knowing these reasons aren’t valid, will help push you over the edge, allowing yourself to find your passions.  If you can re-approach the exercises I mentioned in my previous posts now that you’ve cleared the “mental hurdles.” I promise to give you step-by-step guidance on how to take the first steps into turning your passion into a career in my next post.

If you have other reasons preventing you from uncovering your passion, please leave a comment below.  I promise not to ridicule you.  I’d just love to know other reasons I’ve missed.  🙂